Reflection on Research

Recently I had the great opportunity to go to a screening of the film A Rivers Last Chance. The film highlights the history of the Eel River watershed, including testimonies and experiences from various individuals, academics and professionals, ultimately providing a brief glance at the ecological devastation that has occurred due to a dynamic history of intensive and irresponsible fishing, logging and cannabis cultivation. The film also makes mention of several hydroelectric dams and irrigation diversions at the headwaters of the Eel River that contribute to the current imbalance of the majestic watershed. Currently PG&E is at the negotiation table to relicense the projects, a process which happens only once every 50 years.
Having seen the successful negotiation of various stakeholders and activists involved in the Klamath Hydroelectric Settlement Agreement and how the resolution has laid out the foundation for the removal of four dam projects, I see a key opportunity to restore a local watershed that I have grown to love and cherish from childhood to adulthood. I don't quite know to what capacity I wish to explore the relicensing process, but I think it will be a fulfilling challenge to identify and interview stakeholders, and unravel the red tape that shrouds the decision making process that will ultimately determine the fate of the local watershed for the next 50 years and beyond.
Now the important question...why is this research personally fulfilling to me? I find a lot of intrinsic and aesthetic value in the local environment that makes up Humboldt county, much of this appreciation stemming from my identity as a local resident. Thus I feel a strong calling toward protecting the environment that has helped shaped who I am today. The Eel River, and many of Humboldt counties watershed are subject to a plethora of diversions due to licensed and unlicensed cannabis farms scattered throughout the county. Through my internship at a local consulting firm I have had the unique opportunity to explore the sources of cannabis related land and water impacts, and work with a group of professionals and state/local agencies to help mitigate these impacts. But as the film A Rivers Last Chance revealed, the impacts that plague the Eel River are diverse in source and scope. Thus in order to maximize my skills and abilities, I think it would be tremendously valuable expand my knowledge into an unknown territory and research the dam relicensing process. I believe this project would effectively fulfill my "instinctual" calling to participate in the protection of a local and valuable ecosystem. 

Service Learning in the Forest

     Its hard to believe that my undergraduate experience is already coming to a close. I have so many beautiful memories of these years, and I am a combination of excited, sad, and terrified that it’s almost over. Yet I also know that I have so much to look forward to. Hopefully, I’ll get accepted to SFSU for grad school, and will continue to pursue my dreams of being a community college professor and a novelist. In the meantime, I have a lot to look forward to during my last two semesters at HSU, including my service learning project.

     I was fortunate enough to get involved with Redwood State Parks for my service learning project. I always loved the idea of working outdoors. In times of stress, I often go for hikes to clear my mind, so working on maintaining trails has been both therapeutic and rewarding. I’ve already put in my first three hours, which consisted of maintaining the Native Plant garden at Patrick’s Point State Park. Michelle let me know that there were interpretive walks through the native plant garden for both students and tourists in the spring and summer. She was hoping we could restore the garden in time for the season.

     When Michelle first showed me the trail, the path was narrow and overgrown. The forest had been overrun with Blackberry brambles, which left little room for plant diversity. I was able to stay for three hours that day, and by the end of it, I felt like I had gotten a really great workout in. But more importantly, I looked around at the work I had done and felt a sense of pride.

     The area was hardly a path when I had first gotten there, but I had transformed a section of it into a clear trail through the woods. I’m glad to know that in the spring children will be able to walk through that path and learn about the environment. In my environmental communication class, we learned that one of the major factors that defines a person’s love for nature is having a sense of place, and an environmental mentor. Hopefully the work I’m doing will help guide people towards understanding the importance of protecting nature.

     In the spring, I will be given the chance to lead the interpretive walks through Patrick’s Point. I am elated for the opportunity. Even before I started my service learning project, I would always tell my friends and family about the plant and animal species around us on hikes. I think this experience will give me teaching experience, as well as help me further understand the forests and history of Humboldt County.

     If all goes well, I will continue to work with Redwood State Parks through the summer, leading interpretive walks, pulling invasive ivy, and maintaining trails. I feel very lucky to have the chance to work under the Spruce canopy, to the sound of song birds and wind. I am glad that I went with the service learning option and am excited to see where it takes me.

    

Thoughts on the Future

Well I never made a blog before so... here's my first post. Its crazy being in my last semester of college. Five years I spent at Humboldt State University. Five years of experiences and growth; of hard work and diligence; of constantly reevaluating and assessing a vision of my future. I've spent those years learning about structural problems within human civilization and the different realms of thought that are a part of understanding possible solutions to change them. This has given us Environmental Studies students a more broad and condensed picture of the world and the possible models that can be used for positive and lasting change. Change takes time, and time is something we lack, but if we educate and inspire others to care about nature and the future of our society then we will be able to enact that change much more swiftly and effectively. Howard Zinn points out pessimism comes from the feeling of a lack of change happening in the world, but those breakthroughs go unreported. Though they are kept away from the popular media their actions speak for themselves and those continuous clamor of voices will prevail in the end.

So the question:
"What impact do I hope to gain through my capstone experience?"

I am excited for the service learning aspect of the capstone class. At the moment I am still figuring out what organization to work with. They all sound like enriching experiences. Personally I am gravitating towards places that focus on the human aspect of nature. Instead of building trails for the national park service or managing invasive plant species I am focusing more on organizations that interact with people, either through places that promote workshops and creative expression or who are directly involved with fixing problems within society. It was interesting reading Cress's article about service learning programs and the positive benefits it brings to communities everywhere. After so many years of school I am excited to apply my knowledge and skills to help better these organizations and the community.

The organizations listed for this class all play a small important role in helping the community thrive. I want to replicate these in places where they are needed. I hope to come out of this experience with some new perspectives of how to solve contemporary issues and knowledge of how to start one of my own. I want to be exposed to new opportunities and apply my skills in ways that involve critical thinking and problem solving. I also strive to make strong lasting connections with peers and coworkers and bring a new perspective to the group. I guess I'll just have to wait and see how my future plays out. There is so much work to be done. No time like the present.

Processing--Humaning

Impact

Pressure

Force

":To have an impact - Often used with on

:to impinge or make contact especially forcefully"

(https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/impact).

"What impact do I hope for my capstone to have?"

Impact seems like a strong word choice. Forceful, full of pressure.

One student doing their service learning project at University of Amherst, Massachusetts, asks "how can I have the ideal impact with only 4 hours a week of service?" (9). Service, like service industry, right? We want to leave a mark, help create/co-produce change (whatever that means), do something against the evil imperialist system of white suprema[cis]y-patriarchy-oligarchy-capistlist system (credit goes to Bell Hooks on her use of Imperialist white supremacist capitalist patriarchy which describes the intersectional forces of domination).

How will we do this? 

Where do I even begin?

 I can't speak for anyone else except myself, but I entered college because I believed that I could tackle this system. That with these privileges I should use them to dismantle, deconstruct, and reconstruct the imperialist! (Of course without the knowing of such terms yet). This is the privileged-liberal perspective, right? Fuck striving for the Amerikkkan dream, I was dreaming in college that some how going here would fulfill the check mark boxes to say

ABRA-KADABRA! 

Poof....then capitalism would fall to its knees in some spectacular, sensational swoosh.

Now near the end of my undergraduate experience here at HSU, I'm still wondering how exactly I'm going to do this. In fact I can't do this. It's going to take a lot more than knowing the right words. It's not going to be as sensational as any movie, nor will it be in one day. I entered here with agency, with the mindset that direct action will be the driving force. I learned through classroom discussions, readings, going to standing rock, participating in tree sits and blockades, marching and shouting, that this isn't the only way. I'm realizing "we don't have to engage in grand, heroic actions to participate in the process of change" (Zinn 86). The revolution is in process, has been in process, and will be on going. It's interdisciplinary, multi-generational, and international. This movement requires people from a myriad of positionalities and skill sets to help out. It's taken until now to understand that.

"An artist can choose to bring a creative work into existence, or to work on bringing 

                                         themself into existence through creativity. 

Not by producing works of art, 

but by living creatively                    -                    life as art. 

The world is not simply happening to us                                - it is up to us to ensure that we create situations where we                                    are happening to                                           the world"

-Tameka Careen. No Bound Destination

This capstone experience is about thoughtful experimentation - enjoying what I do, being adaptable to my change interests, while also applying the knowledge accumulated with my skill sets. Zinn states we need to "understand that even when you don't 'win,' there is fun and fulfillment in the fact you have been involved" (79). With being self-centered, I ask, "what do I enjoy doing?", and once I can answer that, I can apply it to what environment, community, and earth needs. Like framing the ENST lens towards almost everything we do. The impact I'm looking to create is on myself and my surroundings - the group and people I work with. Even if I don't find the Cinderella fit for this experience, I can still apply the skills garnered to see how it feels, if this is something I can continue walking in.

I've felt a pressure to be urgent, work hard, go to every meeting, action, and planning. Watching folks around me do this paired with the reality that some never really get rest because every day they face some form of structural violence; I feel the need to not stop. This has led to great highs and lows, to burn out, to exhilaration, to caffeine fueled hazes, to reflection and slowing down. I'm realizing that "we don't have to engage in grand, heroic actions to participate in the process of change" (Zinn 86). I'm better realizing where I can help out, not take up too much space, while also making sure to not be utterly quiet. I'm working towards praxis, the integration and application of theory into action, and whoof does it feel good.

Regaining agency

Starting from the beginning of my journey in college to this point where I’m about to graduate, I have experienced many states of "agency" revolving around social and environmental justice. I first felt wide eyed and bushy tailed about my hopes of being able to make true change in the world around me. I had hope. Now fast-forwarding to today, much of that hope is lacking and it is creating a barrier between the work I'm doing and the work I should be doing. I have lost a lot of the courage and drive to think outside the box and fight unapologetically regardless of the opponent. I'm hoping to regain some agency back through the work that I do in this class. I believe that if I prove to myself that the work I’m doing really is making a difference, than it will catapult me back into action.

So the question here is: What impact do I hope to have throughout this experience?

Before answering this question, I must give a little background as to why I chose my project in the first place. My capstone project includes working with middle school kids in an after school program. I chose this program because I went through most of my life never being exposed to a lot of truths about the world that I wish I knew earlier in life, and I’m hoping to empower kids so that they don’t have to wait as long as I did. I have never worked with kids and have never been fully exposed to kids in my adult years, so needless to say, this will be challenging. But I have already gained a broader appreciation for them and their sense of self in the world as it is today growing up in the unique culture that is Humboldt County. The impact that I hope to make is simply to inspire them to love life, love the world around them, and most importantly, critically think about what their place in the world is and what it can be. I would like to empower them to never take life for what it is but to always fight for what they want. This may be difficult is such a short amount of time and with no experience in doing this work, but I’m just taking it one step at a time. 

The impact I hope to make through my Capstone is a stronger mindset of leadership and motivation to move a community to act on supporting the environment around them. I want to be able to be more confident with my speaking skills because I want to be able to get my point across with clarity and passion. The Capstone will give me the tools to persuade people to care more about their local debates pertaining to the local wildlife and nature around them.

"Ralph Waldo Emerson once asked what we would do if the stars only came out once every thousand years. No one would sleep that night, of course. The world would create new religions overnight. We would be ecstatic, delirious, made rapturous by the glory of God. Instead, the stars come out every night and we watch television"(Hawken).

This quote relates to the crisis many people know there are all these trails they are allowed to walk on. What would happen if it was every 20 years they could walk on that path and it would only be a selective few earned the opportunity to walk on that trail? Many of us would be putting so much money down and interest in making sure we could see the amazing protected area that doesn't get touched by humans for 20years. The protection of our environments is crucial but many of us take trials and parks for granted that they are open almost all year. The capstone of mine gives me the opportunity to communicate with the public of a couple trials that are needing protection and work. The public needs to fund the organization I will be volunteering at to make the area they love hiking and walking on protected as well as more accessible. I feel my Capstone will have a huge impact on my opportunity in future jobs and my own confidence in myself to handle more adult situations that may arise during the time I am working on my Capstone

The Intangible Riches of Making an Impact

This morning was the super blue blood moon, the first and last time I will lay my eyes on such a rare astronomical event. I have never been one to feel deeply synced with the cycles of the moon, but as I sit down to write my first ever blog at the start of the new year, I have a feeling 2018 is going to be a year of many firsts and lasts. My last first week of college after 8 years! My last days living in the beautiful Humboldt County! My first time applying and interviewing for permanent jobs, and possibly the last time I will feel strapped down to working seasonal jobs for the Park Service due to college semesters. This is first time I feel limitless to the places and opportunities I can travel to in this world.

Now, I say this lightly, because as many of you may know, I have been fortunate to travel cross country and work for the National Park Service (NPS) as a trail crew leader in Maine due to the benefits of working seasonally while in college. For the past seven years I have always felt like college is almost a side job to my already jump-started career with the NPS, and every semester I question whether I even need a Bachelor's degree with my foot already in the door with a federal agency. However it is through my studies of the sciences and social injustices of the environment that I have become an agent of change as I read and wrote about everything from the chemical imbalances in the atmosphere, land, and water that have resulted in anthropogenic climate change, to the lack of accessibility and diversity of People of Color on public lands. I have and will continue to use this knowledge to grow more compassionate and become a more active global citizen.
Many of us pursue college with the desire to make a difference in our own lives and possibly the lives of others. Throughout the summers working as a trail maintenance crew leader for 15-18 year old Youth Conservation Corps members, I have been fulfilled with feeling that I am making that little bit of a difference in their lives. By introducing teens to the outdoors, and showing them the dying art of what it means to work with your hands and embrace the amount of layers of sweat and dirt caked onto your face, and learn what it means to work as a team--reliant on keeping each other safe, some of the many wonders of the outdoors that brings people with a common bond together.

You push each other beyond your limits. You press on, despite fatigue and fear. You conquer together, and you share an experience that sets you free. And as a female leader, I am proud to be a Jill of some trades and share it with other girls who are standing where I once was, wondering what in the hell I was getting myself into, but I knew standing there face to face with a fiery chainsaw, that my life would begin to unfold in proportion to the courage I had to get dirty and make an impact.
And so from here, along with all of the other many seniors holding their trembling heads high, about to receive their degrees with a sense of hope and wonder of what impact they will make, I will continue to persist, with the "desperate patience of Sisyphus endlessly pushing that boulder up the mountain," and quite literally sometimes!

 Acadia National Park, Maine 2015

Zinn, Howard. “The Optimism of Uncertainty.” The Impossible Will Take a Little While, edited by Paul Rogat Loeb, Basic Books, 2004, pp. 84.